966. Keys for Godly Relationships, and the importance of forgiving others when they have hurt us!
This is a picture of my mother and father, Ruth and Orson Pratt Miles, both the most charitable people I have ever known! The article below tells a very touching story about charity, and how important it is to forgive others. It helps both you and them! They were married on Christmas Day, 84 years ago -- 1933. Mother was a school teacher, and the only time they could have a little honeymoon was over the Christmas vacation! The problem with that is that they got so busy with Christmas that they didn't get to celebrate their anniversary often!
35. Sacrificing for others, like Jesus! Charity and Forgiveness!
Today I really liked this article in the Meridian Magazine, Dec. 13, 2013. At this Christmas I hope we can make peace with anyone with whom we may not have a "Godly Relationship." What better time to forgive others, and show charity? Jesus's life was always the example we want to follow.
I have condensed the article, and put my own "italics" in some places.
Keys for Godly Relationships
By Wallace GoddardWe might well ask, what has it cost Jesus to be our friend, our healer, and our Savior? We cannot comprehend the cost. He paid dearly! We must make sacrifices in order to build, sustain, or grow a relationship.
We tend to think that great relationships should be effortless. We often think they just happen with magical energy. We tend to think the surest sign of a good relationship is its easiness. In God’s great directive for heavenly relationships, He provides two keys. One of them is that we “let virtue garnish our thoughts unceasingly” (D&C 121:45). In the context of passages about virtue going out of Jesus in order to bless people, (such as the woman who had an issue of blood, and was healed when she touched him) this instruction takes on new significance. We, like Jesus, must be willing to sacrifice for the people we love. Godly relationships are built on compassion and forgiveness.
One story was told by Elder Boyd K. Packer in 1977 (“The Balm of Gilead,” Ensign, Nov. 1977, 59). He told of a much-revered and saintly man who had once served as a mission president and whom he came to know and was taught a vital lesson by him. Here’s how Elder Packer told the story:
He grew up in a little community with a desire to make something of himself. He struggled to get an education. He married his sweetheart, and presently everything was just right. He was well employed, with a bright future. They were deeply in love, and she was expecting their first child.
The night the baby was to be born, there were complications. The only doctor was somewhere in the countryside tending to the sick. After many hours of labor, the condition of the mother-to-be became desperate. Finally the doctor was located. In the emergency, he acted quickly and soon had things in order. The baby was born and the crisis, it appeared, was over.
Some days later, the young mother died from the very infection that the doctor had been treating at another home that night. John’s world was shattered. He had lost his wife. He had no way to tend both the baby and his work. As the weeks wore on, his grief festered. “That doctor should not be allowed to practice,” he would say. “He brought that infection to my wife. If he had been careful, she would be alive today.”He thought of little else, and in his bitterness, he became threatening. . . .
One night a knock came at his door. A little girl said simply, “Daddy wants you to come over. He wants to talk to you.” “Daddy” was the stake president. A grieving, heartbroken young man went to see his spiritual leader. This spiritual shepherd had been watching his flock and had something to say to him.
The counsel from that wise servant was simply, “John, leave it alone. Nothing you do about it will bring her back. Anything you do will make it worse. John, leave it alone."
My friend told me then that this had been his trial—his Gethsemane. How could he leave it alone? Right was right! A terrible wrong had been committed and somebody must pay for it. But he struggled in agony to get hold of himself. And finally, he determined that whatever else the issues were, he should be obedient… He determined to follow the counsel of that wise spiritual leader. He would leave it alone.
Then he told me, “I was an old man before I understood! It was not until I was an old man that I could finally see a poor country doctor—overworked, underpaid, run ragged from patient to patient, with little medicine, no hospital, few instruments, struggling to save lives, and succeeding for the most part. He had come in a moment of crisis, when two lives hung in the balance, and had acted without delay.”
“I was an old man,” he repeated, “before I finally understood! I would have ruined my life,” he said, “and the lives of others.” Many times he had thanked the Lord on his knees for a wise spiritual leader who counseled simply, “John, leave it alone.”
And that is the counsel I bring again to you. If you have a festering grudge, if you are involved in a dispute, “Behold what the scripture says [and it says it fifty times and more]—man shall not smite, neither shall he judge; for judgment is mine, saith the Lord, and vengeance is mine also, and I will repay” (Mormon 8:20).
I say therefore, “John, leave it alone. Mary, leave it alone.” [End of Elder Packer’s words]
What does this great story have to do with charity? Perhaps the commonest form of charity is simple forgiveness. In our families and friendship circles, we are invited to do what Jesus did better than any of us: set aside all charges against the people in our lives. Set aside the ways they have disappointed us. See past the weakness and frailties to the hopes and intentions of our fellow travelers.
So what are the keys to godly relationships? I think they are a willingness to sacrifice combined with charity—the willingness to forgive. God promises unbelievable blessings for those who apply these two principles:
.....Then shall thy confidence wax strong in the presence of God; and the doctrine of the priesthood shall distill upon thy soul as the dews from heaven. The Holy Ghost shall be thy constant companion, and thy scepter an unchanging scepter of righteousness and truth; and thy dominion shall be an everlasting dominion, and without compulsory means it shall flow unto thee forever and ever. (D&C 121:45-46).
Remarkable promises! May God bless us to follow the principles that will allow us to enjoy the sacred blessing of godly relationships. (end of article).
Do you have anyone with whom you should make peace, and "leave it alone". It will make this Christmas season so much more meaningful!
